Ronald’s Mission

By Danial Smith

“Who the fuck are you?”

I jolted up and looked around the room . Two people stood in front of me, waiting for an answer. It was then that I noticed that they were not people. They were skeletons. And the room was on fire.

“Who the fuck are you?” one of the skeletons repeated. “Are you fucking stupid?”

He took a step toward me, and I flinched back. The sheets came off a bit, exposing some of my body. Or lack thereof. I noticed that I was also a skeleton and proceeded to scream.

The skeleton slapped me. “Look, guy, I don’t know who you are or why you’re in my house so you better start giving me some answers. Who are you?”

“I… I don’t know. Where am I? What’s going on?” Then it all hit me. My name is Ronald and I’m on a mission. A mission bestowed upon me by the cosmos to restore the order of the universe. I must unite a team of super-warriors and fight the King of Bad… Donald Trump.

“Is this guy a fucking idiot? Doesn’t even know his own name… Holy fuck. And now he’s just staring into space. Fuck me.”

“My name is Ronald. It is my mission to assemble a team of warriors to defeat the King of Bad. You two are going to help me. What are your names?”

The two skeletons stood there, shocked. “Guy, did you just say… defeat the KING OF BAD? Are you insane?”

“That’s my mission. And you two are supposed to help me. What are your names?”

“Uh… I’m Phil, and this is Bernadette.”

“Great. Let’s get moving. We’ve got a lot of work to do.”

to be continued…