Michelle Obama takes down Twinkies in Covert Attack

    Four years in and one of the most polarizing elements of President Barack Obama’s first term is still his infamous “kill list” through which he decides which enemies of the state live and die. The global scope and international implications of this war on terror, while intense, have overshadowed a similar growing war at home - First Lady Michelle Obama’s war on obesity. Though she only recently adopted her husband’s “kill list” strategy, she has already bagged her first target.

Nicolas Cage to Play Nicolas Cage in Nicolas Cage Biopic: An Interview

     A film production we all saw coming, Nicolas Cage has signed a $30 million development deal with Universal Studios to produce what Cage says is “the best movie since the Bible”. Our reporters then informed Mr. Cage that the Bible was not a movie but was, in fact, a book. Mr. Cage’s responded by asking if casting was still underway for the role of God.